My son has a severe protein allergy to milk & soy. This is not the same as being lactose intolerant. This is not the same as colic. This is a severe allergy that has almost taken the life of my child twice. This allergy is time consuming, life consuming, overwhelming and frustrating. People seem to think it is as easy as just not giving him milk or soy, but it is not.
It is label reading. It is shopping at 4 different stores to get all of his safe foods. It is frustration of not finding any foods he can eat because soy is in everything. It is the disappointing trips to the grocery store, and returning home yet again empty handed for this child.
It is calling and being on hold with food companies for what seems like hours to be 100% certain that the vitamin E or natural flavoring is not soy based, because soy fat ingredients do not require labeling for allergens. It is constant cross contamination research to check what foods are run on the same line as foods made with dairy and soy, because I will not let a drop enter his body.
It is constant research, constant planning, and constant thought about what foods to try next and in what order. It is the facts about food constantly running through my head.
It is constant recipe search, trying to find new ideas for the same foods search, and recipe experimentation. It is the constant meal planning. It is food journaling.
It is frequent trips to the store, since everything needs to be made from scratch. It is the steaming, blending, storing, cleaning, and repeat, multiple times a day. It is the not having the luxury to do "fast food" ever, even on those days where you just need a break from cooking.
It is trying to explain to his sister why she can't share her cookie with her brother. It is the look on his face when he wants to try just a bite of what you are eating.
It is expensive! All his foods need to be organic, natural, and whole. It is having to give up the luxuries that are my sanity in order to pay for hypoallergenic formula, because each can cost $39 and one can lasts about 48 hours. Although expenses are the smallest of the issues because his health is more important than anything money can buy!
It is the constant wonder if a behavior is due to an allergy or not. He is fussy: is he tired or reacting? He is not eating: is he full or is he reacting? He had 3 dirty diapers today: just an off day, or is he reacting? He is sleeping a lot today: is he just tired, or is he reacting? He seems uncomfortable: is it his teeth or is it his stomach? It is the fact that your heart always goes to the allergy, and your head has to try to talk your heart out of it.
It is the poop checking. Every day for 7months, poop check.
It is the not having anything in common with your friends anymore, because you eat, sleep, and breath this allergy. It is talking to people in online support groups that you have never met before more than talking to your friends, because they are the people that truly get what you are going through.
It is the prevention and worry of cross contamination in your own home. It is the little decisions about food that have turned into monstrous ones. It is the selfishness of wanting to introduce more foods then you should for convenience, and then the guilt of even thinking of that. It is the constant thoughts of food running through your head that have taken all the joy and fun out of introducing them to your child.
And the worst of all is the constant anxiety that you are going to put your baby through a reaction again if you don't do everything right. It is the constant fear that overwhelms you every time you put something new into your child's mouth.
It is label reading. It is shopping at 4 different stores to get all of his safe foods. It is frustration of not finding any foods he can eat because soy is in everything. It is the disappointing trips to the grocery store, and returning home yet again empty handed for this child.
It is calling and being on hold with food companies for what seems like hours to be 100% certain that the vitamin E or natural flavoring is not soy based, because soy fat ingredients do not require labeling for allergens. It is constant cross contamination research to check what foods are run on the same line as foods made with dairy and soy, because I will not let a drop enter his body.
It is constant research, constant planning, and constant thought about what foods to try next and in what order. It is the facts about food constantly running through my head.
It is constant recipe search, trying to find new ideas for the same foods search, and recipe experimentation. It is the constant meal planning. It is food journaling.
It is frequent trips to the store, since everything needs to be made from scratch. It is the steaming, blending, storing, cleaning, and repeat, multiple times a day. It is the not having the luxury to do "fast food" ever, even on those days where you just need a break from cooking.
It is trying to explain to his sister why she can't share her cookie with her brother. It is the look on his face when he wants to try just a bite of what you are eating.
It is expensive! All his foods need to be organic, natural, and whole. It is having to give up the luxuries that are my sanity in order to pay for hypoallergenic formula, because each can cost $39 and one can lasts about 48 hours. Although expenses are the smallest of the issues because his health is more important than anything money can buy!
It is the constant wonder if a behavior is due to an allergy or not. He is fussy: is he tired or reacting? He is not eating: is he full or is he reacting? He had 3 dirty diapers today: just an off day, or is he reacting? He is sleeping a lot today: is he just tired, or is he reacting? He seems uncomfortable: is it his teeth or is it his stomach? It is the fact that your heart always goes to the allergy, and your head has to try to talk your heart out of it.
It is the poop checking. Every day for 7months, poop check.
It is the not having anything in common with your friends anymore, because you eat, sleep, and breath this allergy. It is talking to people in online support groups that you have never met before more than talking to your friends, because they are the people that truly get what you are going through.
It is the prevention and worry of cross contamination in your own home. It is the little decisions about food that have turned into monstrous ones. It is the selfishness of wanting to introduce more foods then you should for convenience, and then the guilt of even thinking of that. It is the constant thoughts of food running through your head that have taken all the joy and fun out of introducing them to your child.
And the worst of all is the constant anxiety that you are going to put your baby through a reaction again if you don't do everything right. It is the constant fear that overwhelms you every time you put something new into your child's mouth.
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